Writing the Pine

A.J. gives up a few long balls in an Interleague matchup

Phillies in 5. In the series that’s been dubbed The Liberty Series (Statue v. Bell), the I-95 Series, the AmTrak Series, or even a throwback series matching up some of baseball’s oldest teams, the Phillies have the edge.

I’m calling it Cheesesteaks v. Cheesecakes. It has a nice ring to it. And plus, I like cheesesteaks more.

I love the Yankees. I think their starting pitching trio of C.C. Sabathia, A.J. Burnett, and Andy Pettitte have been stellar so far in the playoffs. The Yankees offense has been on and off, but regardless have been led by the resurgence of Alex Rodriguez as an offensive force to be reckoned with. The Yankees have a great defense, home field advantage, and Mariano Rivera – the greatest closer and relief pitcher of all-time. And it’s not even close. But why am I still siding with the Phillies?

“If we’re nice, we’ll let it go six,” Rollins said. “But I’m thinking five, close it out at home.”

Jimmy “Nostradamus” Rollins predicted a Phillies victory in 5. This is the same man that predicted a division title in 2007, a World Series title in 2008, and a Yankees-Phillies World Series matchup in a Playboy interview. I am not going against this man’s prediction. He even said it was going to rain on Wednesday. This man is a genius. He should be a weatherman in the off-season. In fact, during this year’s WBC, the world was able to see side-by-side Derek Jeter and Jimmy Rollins. It was clear that Derek Jeter was past his prime and needed to give up his starting spot to Rollins. Anytime you can give up your job to a shortstop batting .250, you have to. End of discussion.

They have Brad Lidge. A beast of a closer with a nasty slider. He’s recorded some of the highest K/9 ratios in the history of the game. Just filthy stuff. He’s unhittable and during clutch playoff moments he just WILL NOT CRACK. Mariano Rivera wears Brad Lidge underwear.

Ryan Howard is a man amongst little, feeble children. He’s a left-handed Paul Bunyan but instead of chopping wood, he slices right through fastballs. I’m not going to say anything potentially negative about someone 6′3″, 230. Just not gonna mess with the big guy. Heck no.

He's much bigger and . . . err . . . darker in person.

Raul “I’m not going to accuse you of any suspicious uptick in production” Ibanez was one of the best signings of the off-season. But you better not accuse him of anything suspicious. OR HE WILL KILL YOU. BREAK YOUR NECK AND EAT YOUR CHILDREN. Ahem. Sorry. A little bit of rage I suppose. At first even my Philly friends questioned the move by new GM Ruben Amaro, Jr (who btw is a frickin’ genius and has been awarded the Nobel GM Prize for winning the 2011 and 2014-16 World Series and for his “extraordinary efforts to strengthen his ball club and team’s chemistry and promote synergy“).

Pedro Martinez is going to pitch game two. PEDRO! The Yankees Killer. Future Hall of Famer. Ageless wonder.

Taking down the Yankees. One fat, old man at a time.

Charlie Manuel is an old-school coach. He doesn’t listen to Sabremetrics and follow inane statistics like VORP and Win Shares. He goes by his gut (a rather large one too I might add) and doesn’t care what you think. In fact, he’ll fight you.

They also have something the Yankees don’t have. An annoying, green mascot to rile up the crowd and really mess up the away team.

No, not the Philly Phanatic

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Phillies fan avert your eyes. This is when I remove my veil of sarcasm and give my actual prediction for the series. Something also tells me any Yankees fan has skimmed past this section and is ready to flame me on the message board. So be it. That my friend was a Reverse-Jinx/super-sarcastic World Series prediction.

I think this is going to be a good series between two very similar teams.

• The best team from each respective league comes into the series boasting some of the best offense in the league. They can do it in bunches, with homeruns, late in the game, and hit both lefties and righties.
• They both come from hitter-friendly ballparks where they have become really cozy and comfortable.
• The Yankees have the best home record and the Phillies have the best road record
• Left handed Aces and former Cy-Young winners to anchor the staff.
• Two of the best closers in the game, one who does with a cutter, the other with a wicked slider.
• All-Stars, MVPs, and some of the best at each of their respective positions play for these two clubs.
• They can play each League’s style. The Phillies have Matt Stairs as a clutch pinch hitter or DH. The Yankees have some speedsters like Brett Gardner to play small-ball/NL style.
• A-Rod v. Ryan Howard. Nuff said.

That said I believe the Yankees will prevail in 6 games to bring home their 27th World Championship.

Of course to do that, they’ll need good pitching, better hitting with RISP, and for the love of God, break Brad Lidge’s confidence and spirit. All you need is one late-game hit or home run and his psyche will be crushed. He’s toast after that and then we’ll feast on their pitching like kings.

If you don’t believe me, there’s always this theory:

http://alterdestiny.blogspot.com/2009/10/inevitably-of-new-yankees-dynasty.html